feminine hygiene isle
Sanitary protection (UK) isle
Both euphemisms refer to the social value of ‘cleanliness’ something that traditionally groups with lower social standing own – the cleaning. The US euphemisim clearly cites this as a female issue. Women, cleaning, clearly acceptable terms to put together. The name Jenn overheard a female using refers to females in a respectful way without raising cleaniliness or anything that might disturb people who don’t bleed (blood?): Lady pants. I suspect lady pants will never catch on as a euphamism because it has too few syllables per word to be sufficiently pretentious for a modern euphamism (e.g. used = previously owned). Lets play with the experience to find a new euphemism.
This isn’t a hygeine issue because the blood is fresh. I don’t like the inference that I have a hygiene problem because I’m a girl. Bad marketting. We could ’balance’ the names by also having a ‘male hygeine’ isle. The male hygiene isle would contain products for cleaning spatter from around the toilet (rest room), removing sperm ejaculated while asleep (wet dreams) with quick sheet drying abilities, and other messy stuff that is male-body-function-specific. Some wonderful product-euphamisms possible here, for example, dry dream wipes. Rather than add another set of gender specific hygeine problems to be solved, lets cut the word hygeine.
This is a blood-flow management issue. Management is a much better word more taking control and sorting things out. To avoid the monosyllabic word blood lets pair management with the technical term – Menstruation. Ideal. Lots of syllables, unintelligible, unpronouncable to the uninitiated (children), and it start’s with an M.
Menstruation Management isle
They could stock this supermarket isle with pain killers, stress relief products, chocolate, action/violence DVDs and bandages for anyone who said the wrong thing to the Menstruator. With a name like feminine hygeine the products do not sit naturally with the other products that a menstruator might impulse purchase at the same time. In the US feminine hygeine products are often placed by nappies. How whacky is that? It says to me, this is your place: clean the messes, have babies and clean their messes. Not an embodiment of the progressive attitude I’d expect to encounter in North America. I’m not going to impulse buy some baby pants when I’m suffering from pre-menstrual tension/syndrome. Shops are missing out on a key marketting opportunity by implying menstruating women have a hygiene problem, not mechandising to leverage female financial independence, and offending people like me by forcing me to walk by baby pants.
June 23rd, 2006
Wendy, haven’t you heard? We’re women, so of course we’re unclean. Just own up to it. Sigh.
I like your reversal and exploration of what male cleanliness would entail. It’s revealing, isn’t it? Evidently, we just wouldn’t dream of referring to men’s bodily secretions as “dirty”. Thanks patriarchy, for showing me the way!
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