freakin’ voice recognition menus

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aaaaAAAaarrrggghhhhhhhhh

Listening to a freakin’ voice menu (FVRM)  ask me if the phone-number it has for me is correct:  Say Yes or No

Wendy:   No

FVRM: I didn’t hear you please answer yes or no

Wendy: NO

FVRM: I didn’t hear you please answer yes or no

Wendy: NO

FVRM: I didn’t hear you please answer yes or no

Wendy: NO NO NO NO NO NO

FVRM: please speak your phone number or enter it on the dialpad

I type  the number into the dialpad.   Subsequent menu options did not have dialpad alternatives.    I tried really hard to imitate the US accent of the FVRM.   Mostly failing.   Finally:

FVRM: to ensure service quality this call may be recorded.

Wendy: a-hahahahahahaHAHAHA   (falls off chair).

A conversation with customer service representative (CSR),   ends with my verifying that I understand:

 You can cancel my DSL service and only my DSL service,   not my phone service which is also supplied by your company.   You can only cancel my DSL service now,   you can’t take a date to end it on.   I can give your company an advance cancellation date for my home phone service.   I need to call another number to do this.       If I cancel my phone service my DSL will not work.  I will still be charged for it until I cancel it.  

CSR:   that’s right.   I can forward you to the number where they will be able to cancel your phone service in advance.

Wendy:   yes please.

dialtone (I am disconnected).  

When,  3 FVRM, later I found a nice lady she managed to book my home-phone service cancellation and my DSL cancellation to happen at a future date  at the same time.  

Wonderful lady

freakin’ voice recognition menus
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one wonderful muse on “freakin’ voice recognition menus”

  1. theCultFigurine writes:

    Let me guess. QWest?

       0 likes

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