confident swagger
3 male colleages and I wandered along a crowded Bourbon St (New Orlean’s) on a balmy November Saturday night. The first night of a work related conference, we were full of smiles and energy. A Sassy Young American Lass (SYAL) worked straight up to me, flung her arms around my neck and attached her mouth to mine. She stopped us all in our tracks. I peeled her tentacles from around my neck, held her shoulders at arms length
wendy: excuse me, but I don’t think we’ve been introduced
SYAL: ooooOOOOOOOooooo and a cute English accent TOO!
wendy: incase there is any doubt, I’m not a lesbian
SYAL: You look like a lesbian, ashame, ciao…
Turning to a giggling colleague who, unbeknownst to me at that time was ‘polyamorous’ (a swinger) and, was much amused my complete lack of flow with the young lady.
wendy: what does an american lesbian look like?
swinger: you
wendy: big nose, spectacles, flat shoes and a confident swagger?
swinger: short hair
Later that night he put a slightly non-sober me in a Taxi to make sure I got home without being accosted for my cute crop. A subsequent informal survey of my US friends determined that locally short hair looked very lesbian….
Flat Eric looks out over the Mississippi as a steamboat rolls by
