confident swagger

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3 male colleages and I wandered along a crowded  Bourbon St (New Orlean’s) on a balmy November Saturday night.   The first night of a work related conference, we were full of smiles and energy.   A  Sassy Young American Lass (SYAL) worked straight up to me, flung her arms around my neck and attached her mouth to mine.   She stopped us all in our tracks.   I peeled her tentacles from around my neck, held her shoulders at arms length

wendy: excuse me,   but I don’t think we’ve been introduced

SYAL: ooooOOOOOOOooooo and a cute English accent TOO!

wendy: incase there is any doubt,   I’m not a lesbian

SYAL:  You look like a lesbian, ashame, ciao…

Turning to a giggling  colleague who,   unbeknownst to me at that time was ‘polyamorous’ (a swinger) and, was  much amused my complete lack of flow with the young lady.  

wendy: what does an american lesbian look like?

swinger: you

wendy: big nose, spectacles, flat shoes and a confident swagger?

swinger: short hair

Later that night  he put a slightly non-sober me in a Taxi to make sure I got home  without being accosted  for my cute crop. A subsequent informal  survey of my US friends determined that locally  short hair looked very lesbian….

Flat Eric looks out over the Mississippi as a steamboat rolls by

Flat Eric looks out over the Mississippi as a steamboat rolls by

confident swagger
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