the benefit of my advice

tags: ,

feeling compelled to share my experience I’ll ask

  • have you tried this…
  • do you know about that…

captive silenced female mannequin

Asking before I’ve heard all the story. Not finding out all the twists and turns in the story as the teller may find it. Not giving full space for the storyteller to explore and reflect at their own pace, in thier own perspective, which is so much more full of more relevant feeling and being.

The story may be about a problem, but the telling of the story may be all that is needed. No solution sought, just the time and empathy of the listener.

Sometimes it’s difficult to remember that even pragmatic advice may not be of real benefit, it may even detract from the real value of talking around the problem.

the benefit of my advice
rate wendys scribble

6 bits of lovely banter on “the benefit of my advice”

  1. ExpatEgghead writes:

    Yes. So hard to find a genuine listener. I’m learning and available at very reasonable rates.

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    [reply]

  2. Happy Frog and I writes:

    So very true. It is a lesson I keep trying to remember to learn properly. Often when I have a major problem I do indeed just want to talk it out rather then hear practical advice. Odd really.

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    [reply]

  3. Kevin writes:

    (anti-spam = “******,” which I reckon gives me the go-ahead for this)

    Women and men tend to approach problems from different directions, probably down as much to nurture as nature. Men will tend to try to fix a problem; women will try to explore the consequences of the problem. This mis-match is possibly the cause of more arguments than anything other than getting directions to a wedding in a strange town.

    (note: wendy removed the anti-spam word – see muse moderation rule 7)

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    [reply]

    wendy writes

    Kevin, are you calling me a man? The wendy house jury are currently discussing whether to blast this comment for the violation of muse moderation rule number 4.

       0 likes

    [reply]

    Kevin writes

    Not at all, hence my careful use of the word “tend.”

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    [reply]

    wendy writes

    Sampo swung the judges vote in your favour.

    Hedge-words, such as’tend’ ‘may’ ‘might’ etc are not normally acceptable defence for flagrant re-production of stereotypical prejudicial gender-based descriptions. D

       0 likes

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