:: The Wendy House ::

Hittavainen, the Karelian god of hares has turned up in the Wendy House garden. 

According to the BBC Hares crop up in Mythology all over the place and are associated with the Moon, the celestial skies and the Sun, with fertility, the dawn, cunning and bravery.

This one is associated with pebbles purloined from beaches all over the world.

The Observer,  also known as The Gaurdian, reports that:

Reading is ‘worse than Beirut’, claims Terry Waite

Former hostage Terry Waite stunned Women’s Institute members in Reading by telling them that dealing with their town’s traffic was worse than being held captive for almost five years, after being delayed on his way to speak to them.

Do I think Terry is exaggerating a bit at the detriment of our glorious town’s already overly maligned reputation? 

OH YES! 

The town traffic may indeed be a bit slower than the executive’s posh car, or Fiat Panda,  can travel.  It is, however, a reasonable, leisurely, pace for the good and even-tempered people of the town to go about their honest toil. 

Even the BBC doesn’t cite Reading’s roads as main UK traffic black spots.  No wonder those members of the Women’s Institute were stunned to hear such ill considered twaddle uttered from a professional public speaker and humanitarian. 

Outraged-Wendy-citizen-of-Reading

The Islands of the Cyclades are strewn with white churches,  often with blue roofs and all with bell-towers.  The bells would ring between 6pm and 7.20pm a single tone,  often flat, with a basic tune conveyed by a regularly varied pace between the rings.

Graveyards were normally accompanied by a small church,  mainly churches stood alone on island high ground,  often perched on Island mountain tops.

Greek graveyards were wonderful.  White marble graves are adorned with photographs of the deceased,  lit oil lamps, occassionally lit incense burners and well maintained live potted plants.  The graves are tended regularly and often have a little cupboard built into the headstone where the carers store basic maintainance equipment.  Some graves contained glass sliding doors behind which the photographs sat and occassionally a couple of glasses implying that the living came here to take a drink with the departed. 

The Geeeks recognise their elderly and departed in a more noticable way than I am used to in either the UK or US cultures I’ve lived within.

This Imerovigli graveyard contains rows of mausoleum type rooms.  Each mausoleum contained labelled wooden boxes with many different photographs,  places for the living to visit the dead in peace.

I wonder whether the departed are carried to their resting place by mule…

On the small island of koufounissi they’ve rigged St. Georges church. 

One highlight of my Greek holiday involved sitting on this church wall in the early evening listening to the ceremony songs waft through the open doors,  children wobble in and out of the church,  two old ladies greeting attendees and shepharding the children,  watching the passers-by cross themselves as the sunset gathered on the horizon.

Great Knollys street is cited on several websites as being named after a family, with no information on the family beyond the name.  Snooping the net leads me to suspect it is the family that included Sir Robert Knollys,  born 1547 in Reading,  progeny of the Lord Mayor of London in 1409-1410.  Sir Robert Knollys was variously an MP for Reading,  and keeper of Twickenham based Syon House for an order fo Brigittine nuns (and monks - mixed orders).  Wikipedia ingenouosly describes him as ‘one of Henry VIII henchmen.  There is a quaint story stemming from Sir Robert Knollys’ time as lord Mayor of London that I stumbled across here:

The Knollys Rose Ceremony commemorates an ancient City custom dating from 1381. Sir Robert Knollys owned a house on the West Side of Seething Lane. During one of his absences abroad his wife is reputed to have purchased a property on the east side of Seething Lane and built a footbridge over the lane to the other side, without the equivalent of planning permission and resulted in the City Corporation of the day imposing a rent of one red rose, payable each year on the Feast of St John the Baptist.

There are some red roses blooming in the Wendy House garden. In Reading.

Robert Knollys’ son Francis Knollys is also a likely source for the street name.  Francis was a puritan protestant who was ‘granted the manor of Caversham’ .  The Wikipedia description is slightly less partisan than its description of his father.  Francis was a friend of Henry VIII.  Francis was also a close confident of Elizabeth I throughout her life.  He is cited on web site as being given the title ”Treasurer of the Royal Bedchamber“ .  He was also long-time warden of Mary Queen of Scotts during her detention.   Francis frequently resided in the disolved Reading Abbey where he would entertain Queen Elizabeth I. 

My emerging picture of Reading’s character is growing to be pro-Royalty,  pro-protestantism with lashings of pre-christianity,  and welcoming of female roles extending beyond those stereotyped as wives and potential wives.

 I like Reading.

Edited after Mrs. P.s comment to systematically add an s to the end of evey use of the word Knolly,  and move around a few apostrophes just for fun.

Singing and high spirits in the streets near cemetery junction,  Balloons tied to fire engines,  lamp-posts,  leaple and shops.  Police directing traffic and cycling aound,  smiling.  A yound boy offered me bottled water and a leaflet.  I took the leaflet and read…  …Nagar Kirtan is a Punjabi term that literally means “neighbourhood hymn singing“.  The seek new year is April 14th,  the day that Sikhism was born in 1699.  It is the holiest day of their calendar.

Wikipedia described Vaisakhi

Such singing and laughter and happiness,  it was a joy to mingle with the crowds

There are strange,  repeating, symbols built into the buildings and public places all around Reading.  There are 4 scallops and 2 crossed pilgrim staff’s on the gate posts of Palmers park.  The Scallops turn up again in the Univerity of Reading’s coat of arms.  

Evidently the shells are thought to be an emblem of pilgramage because pilgrims to Europe would bring back the scallop shells from beaches.  The association with Reading is probably because the old Abbey claimed to hold the hand of St James as a holy relic that shell-carrying pilgrims would come to visit.  I wonder how St. James hand got to Reading Abbey….  

Scallop or i-pod?  visit your nana or some dead saints embalmed hand?   Such choices open to the modern traveller.

Four miserable looking people surrounding a chap in a crown on a bridge over the river kennet.  This same symbol also appears on one of the gate-posts of Palmer’s park,  though in not as much full delightful pale-skinned, blonde and blue colouring.  Aparantly this is Reading Town’s coat of Arms and the 4 people are probably burgesses…  ..and the miserable looking person is Queen Elizabeth (1 or 2 depending on how you feel).

A version of this cluster of people turns up on the symbol for ‘Reading School’  the people have an almost ominous range of sly through snide to surreal expressions.  Girl power gone wonkey?

As part of the pre-christian blessing my friend wrote a blessing and we jointly smudged every room, and cupboard, with a Sage and Copal smudge stick while whispering the blessing:

Lady day and Lords of light

Bless this Wendy House and keep it right

Protect it with your love and might

and keep all evil far from sight

Cleanse and bless in love and truth

and keep Wendy safe and prosperous ‘neath your roof

Later,  when the smoke had cleared,  I pulled one of my hawthorn runes from thier bag to name and bond with the house.  I pulled Odal:  “The Odal rune is often associated with property and inheritance, wealth and prosperity“  The association was pleasingly appropriate to the previously written blessing.

The people pictured on this sign on a bridge over the river Kennet do not look altogether happy about Reading gas company.  I wonder who they are meant to be?   Maybe it is King Henry I who founded the Reading Abbey in 1121 and was subsequently buried there before its completion.  The Abbey was built with stone from France and staffed by French monks from Cluny.  Maybe the chap in the crown is king Henry VIII who was responsibly for dissolving the Abbey and martyring the last Abbot by the gruesomely messy method of ‘hung drawn and quartered’ for failing to swear an oath of allegiance to Henry VIII as the supreme leader of the church in England.  Four of Henry VIII wives died (and 2 more a little later)*,  maybe that’s who the four other people are and why they look so sad.  Does anyone out there know?

*edited after AFH’s insightful comment

On remembrance Sunday, 11th of November,  at 11am in London’s Heathrow airport, returning from my Reading home-hunting trip.  An icky place to be at any time and doubly so because of its social significance.  I binge-drank a whole pint of pre-flight beer to console myself while watching the memorial ceremonies at the Whitehall Cenotaph.

In Spains Catholic religious capital Cathedral, Toledo, the burial places of Cardinals are marked by their hats being suspecnded from the ceiling above.  The hats hang until they decompose.  They add an eerie feeling to the cathedral as they gently swing in the silence.

they do not drip messy wax,  they do not blow-out in the gentle church breezes, securely collecting donations,  equal lights for each prayer, only the bulbs need replacing and the cover eases dusting and cleaning.  These prayer installations were in both the Cathedrals I visited in Spain.

Progress? 

The emotional, sensual, experience of an electric prayer barely touches that of lighting, smelling, watching real candles. 

This is one of ‘Wardance’s way-too-small collection of ‘miss-spelt’ church signs they are all so vary god.  I want Maw!

on the western high plains of eastern Washington in the tiny city of Outlook stands a small white church.  Where e-mail meets knee-mail:

using a single grave for more than one body is not a new phenomenon. 

By contrast, national, retrospective decisions to re-use graves and moving bodies lower down probably has some novelty.   The UK government has estimated that they will run-out of grave space within 30 years.  Many graveyards are already full.  Closed to new bodies.  Compulsory re-use of graves is one step they are taking to tackle the problem:

remains will be exhumed and re-interred at a deeper level in a smaller container or casket. A new coffin could then be lowered into the original space and the names of the newly buried added to the existing tombstone or to new plaques.

the earth is verging on flat,  and if it isn’t,  in this here graveyard, we’ll roll the earth ’til it darn well looks flat. 

This ancient rusty garden roller was hidden under a Yew tree in a Devonshire graveyard,  covered in recent mowings and this year’s Ivy growth ready for use in the summer.  In the Church of England  Vergers often arrange for the care of the graveyard,  rolling the grounds. 

Is there a connection between the verge at the roadside and a Verger?  I’ve only been able to find,  create,  a tenuous link using this phrase on the Vergers Guild of the Episcopalian Church website, my highlight:

“assists the clergy in the conduct of public worship, especially in the marshalling of processions“

it looks like part of the verger’s job description is making sure that processors don’t trample on the verges.

The Merriam-Webster defintion of Verge  differentiates the meanings like this:

1 a (1) : a rod or staff carried as an emblem of authority or symbol of office (2) obsolete : a stick or wand held by a person being admitted to tenancy while he swears fealty b : the spindle of a watch balance; especially : a spindle with pallets in an old vertical escapement c : the male copulatory organ of any of various invertebrates
2 a : something that borders, limits, or bounds: as (1) : an outer margin of an object or structural part (2) : the edge of roof covering (as tiling) projecting over the gable of a roof (3) British : a paved or planted strip of land at the edge of a road : SHOULDER b : BRINK, THRESHOLD <a country on the verge of destruction — Archibald MacLeish>

One way of imagining the relationship between these two meanings is that the stick/wand/staff  (1a) is used to shepherd people on the borders/limits/marigns/edge (2a)  back into the fold.

A fleeting moment where one of these men may be cross with the other,  or one man crossed the other.   The presence of a cross design in the forground seemed a subtle suggestion and reinforcement of their possible relationship. 

Segue from Cross to Easter. 

All websites that I found descrbing the origins of the Easter rituals superficially refer to pre-christian religiouns citing fertility and birth making the connection with eggs and bunnies.   This website is exceptional because it provides more and plausible details of some of the pre-christian influences on our current Easter practices and words.   For example the link to the word “East”,  where the sun is reborn.  Here’s a relevant paragraph:

The festival of Eastre was celebrated by the Pagans on the vernal equinox, the first day of spring. The Goddess was said to take the form of a Hare, so effigies of these animals were made to worship her, the origin of the good old Easter Bunny. The Goddess Eastre, the Teutonic Goddess of Fertility is in her aspect of mother to be. Her symbol is the egg, symbolizing fertility in nature and rebirth from the long winter months and the symbol of rebirth since ancient times. The Egyptians and Greeks would bury eggs in the tombs of the dead as a sign of resurrection, and the egg was especially important in the Pagan Eastre festival as a symbol of nature being reborn over again. Therefore, real eggs would be decorated and given as gifts on this day. The Goddess is fertile, rich with promise and potential life. (It is from the word “oestre” that we get the word “oestrogen” / “estrogen” - the female hormone). To the Saxons she was Ostara, in myth she is said to have amused children by turning her bird into a rabbit, the rabbit then laid colored eggs much to the delight of the children.

According to the Mausolea and Monuments Trust (UK) a Mausoleum is:

A mausoleum is a house of the dead. Larger than tombs, these buildings are free-standing roofed structures erected to receive coffins. They take their name from one of the Wonders of the Ancient World, the vast tomb of King Mausolus of Halicarnassus in Asia Minor. Most British mausolea date from the 18th and 19th centuries. Symbols of dynastivc pride, pious respect and love, they stand in their hundreds in churchyards, cemeteries and parks. Many of Britain’s finest architects were involved in their design. Neo-classical, Egyptian or Gothic, they form a varied, emotionally charged, and irreplaceable part of the built heritage….

…  In law they belong to those that built them, but in many cases the families have died out or lost interest.  Parish councils, local authorities and cemetery companies must ensure the buildings do not become dangerous, but are not responsible for their upkeep. So, as private monuments in the public domain, they fall outside the normal patterns of care.

 I’ve seen, noticed, very few mausolea in English graveyards,  they are the exceptional grave style reserved for the Wealthy or well respected.  Thier predominance in the 18th and 19th century maps to the new wealth and changing lifestyles that came with the Industrial Revolution. 

In the many, mainly village, graveyards that I visited during the Tea and Tombstone Tour I noticed only these 2 Mausolea.  Decaying,  broken,  headless gargoyles, rotting wooden doors,  in the Trowbridge cemetery

Many English churches have a Lych gate at the entrance to the graveyard.  I have not yet seen a Lych gate in the USA.  The brief description of the gate I’ve found repeated across the web is:

a roofed gate to a churchyard, formerly used as a temporary shelter for the bier during funerals (noun)

The corpse waits in the Lych (Corpse) gate for the priest to come to it and start the ceremony.  I have not found any online references to the ‘folk’ belief I somehow gathered as a child.  My folk belief is that placing the corpse down in the lych gate somehow stopped evil (pagan?) spirits riding the body into the concecrated grounds of the churchyard.

St. Mary the Virgin, Portbury’s churchyard Lych Gate, dustbin and daffodils:

In some crowded church graveyards the old stones are moved from thier original positions to edges of patchways or the yard.  I have no idea where the original graves are.  This is an example from the 15th Century St. Andrew’s church in Ashburton,  Devon.   The church normally keeps records of the grave-plots. 

Notice that the walkway is also lined with Yew trees.  Despite their amazing lifespan (4,000 yrs?) the Yew tree is poisonous and known as the ‘Death tree’,  it 

“has a tight-grained wood, tough and resilient, used in the past for spears, spikes, staves, small hunting bows and eventually the famous longbows of the Middle Ages. The arrows were tipped with poison made from the Yew. “

The Yews may have predated the placing of the Chrisitain church indicating a pre-christian sacred site.  Placing the yew trees within the church yard or the Church within the Yew-tree site prevented local animals from eating the Yews and gave the religious group control of a core source material for weaponry.

affection after death

there’s a strange mix of neglect and care evident in the rural graveyards.  The grass is recently mowed,  graves more than 300 years are often collapsing and neglected.  In thier collapse they gain a beauty beyond that the Mason’s originally planned for them.  A clear reminder of our transient role in the universe. 

The order of events upon arrival:

1. tea
2. pick-up hire-car
3. tea
4. drive to parents home
5. tea
6. walk mumzie around the local church, Holy Trinity, graveyard before dusk claims the light for the day
7. tea

Innocently wandering through a Dungeness, not Dungeness, graveyard.  As one is wont to do.

Minding my own business. Reading the odd,  very odd, gravestone.  When,

SUDDENLY 

As if from nowhere,  a cryptic cat launched itself at my torso.  It cunningly used pin-prick claws to latch onto my skinny left thigh.  While chewing my zipper and partially succeeding in mesmerizing me with talking eyes the killer kitty eye’d my nose as a potential source of protien:

Scared, me?  Oh yes. 

Lot’s of ‘nice kitty’s were administered to secure my thigh’s freedom. 

Finally I discovered that offering my fingers as a sacrifice helped lure the kitty’s claws from my leg as it performed the twistiest of jumps in a digit devouring frenzy.  My fingers and legs bare punctuation scars…

I’ve not heard an American use the phrase ‘graveyard’ nor seen sign’s with the phrase.  Roads are called ‘cemetary road’ and sign’s indicate cemetaries.  Modern cemetaries are often labelled ’memorial garden’.  The mutliple, relevant, related meanings that come with using the word ’grave‘ appeal to me:

1. dig; excavate.
2. carve or shape with a chisel: sculpture; carve or cut (as letters or figures) into a hard surface: engrave.
3. to impress or fix (as a thought) deeply.

Church of England (C of E) Bishops taught me everything I know about upstanding moral behaviour.  Hoorah!  In this season of Jesus-birthday-induced-bravado things are wont to go a wee bit astray.  The Bish’ of Southwark (pronounced suth-ark) was reputedly in high spirits….

The BBC reports that the Bishop of Sothwark got a tad tiddly when out drinking with the Irish.  What a suprise.

Excerpt from witness at the scene:

Paul Sumpter was playing pool in a bar on, ironically, Crucifix Lane, in Bermondsey, when he heard his car alarm sound.  ”I rushed out there and I saw an old looking guy with his legs hanging out the back of my car,” said the property developer. “My baby’s toys were in the back seat and I could see him chucking them all about the place.”  There was even a Ruth Rendell novel — that was title End in Tears — which was quite ironic. After “dragging” him away, the man initially revealed himself as the Bishop of Woolwich before falling on the pavement and knocking his head which left him unconscious for about five minutes.

Excerpt from Bishop’s perspective:

“I told the police I arrived home without my briefcase and with bruising on my face and a gash on the back of my head. I went to the doctor the next day and was told my injuries were consistent with a blow to the head, so I assumed I had been mugged, but that’s a supposition. I am hoping the police will be able to be clearer.”

This photograph was taken in Soutwark Cathedral on my last UK tour, March 2005. It is the tomb of the Bishop of Soutwark who coordinated the writing of the King James Bible, completed 1611:

Party season and dressing-up time (tree and me) is here! Religious?  Looks like religious consumerism frenzy with some Christianity thrown into the mix based on many diverse seasonal pre-Christian ceremonies and some generally bizarre behaviour.  Seems like mostly well intentioned good fun.  In the Wendy House:

Same tree as last year, wearing it’s party-best with an imposing new Angel atop

Same Wendy as last year,  this year wandering around an EMP seasonal party armed with Camera, LaCroix, Bollywood fans and Russians,  including a very creamy white one.  I was tempted onto the dance floor by Abba’s ‘Dancing Queen’,  kept there by the Bee Gee’s “Saturday night fever” and the Village people’s “YMCA“.  The DJ’s 80’s tunes mapped rather closely to my stereotype of ‘gay’ music.  It’s possible that I was sending an unintentionally inaccurate message about my gender preferences by dancing to these tracks,  they were familiar and FUN!  While LaCroix put her colour theory and unique eye into picture action I tried to capture the atmosphere during a Bollywood style song:

it’s firework’s night in the UK,  401 years since the gunpowder plot.  Below is a rhyme topical to the time of the event.  Most contemporary English people know the first verse and if you say the first line out loud will join in for the second line.  According to Wikipedia the latter verses were gradually lost to shared memory due to lack of use through content offensive to catholics:

Remember, remember the fifth of November,
Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I see no reason why gunpowder treason
should ever be forgot.

Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes,’twas his intent
to blow up the King and the Parliament.
Three score barrels of powder below,
Poor old England to overthrow:
By God’s providence he was catch’d
With a dark lantern and burning match.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, make the bells ring.
Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!
Hip hip hoorah! 

A penny loaf to feed the Pope.
A farthing o’ cheese to choke him.
A pint of beer to rinse it down.
A faggot of sticks to burn him.
Burn him in a tub of tar.
Burn him like a blazing star.
Burn his body from his head.
Then we’ll say ol’ Pope is dead.
Hip hip hoorah!
Hip hip hoorah!

Bonfire night is an annual English event that, for me in the US, is emotionally replaced by July 4th (fireworks celebration) and US elections on November 7th. Today’s bang! started on the November 4th at a friend’s birthday party. 

Hoorah! 

(imagine a couple of Hip swings for good measure)

Fun and beer all around,  in mouths and beards.   Memories of fireworks from July 4th in the US that make me feel closer to the November 5th celebrations in the UK:

Even better, a present (US = gift) turned up in my post (US = mail).  It isn’t even my birthday.  It is,  however, close enough to call this a surprise Birthday present

US commenter’s fictional statement on a football match: 

“previously an umotivated not pretty deadleg would streak into the box and step on an airborne bench, that’s a no-no, giving the opposition a P.K.  History is against the bench“ 

The below commentary on American Broadcasting Company (ABC, US) Portugal vs England World Cup match commentator’s comments will help you translate the above fictional sentence.

go airborne. Another new euphamism!  ‘we’ve seen a lot of players go airborne in these 21 minutes with some nasty landings’  go airborne = jump? 

streaking. “Here’s Rooney streaking up the right side”  In the context of soccer the word streaking is normally reserved for the nude people who dash across the pitch. 

playing benches. “The benches might come into play“  Can you picture it.  Benches playing football.  He must mean the players sat on the benches.  The substitutes.  Why not say substitutes?

not pretty. “English soccer is not pretty but its effective“  Bollocks.  Joe Cole’s footwork is as cute as a freshly baked cherry pie.  That’s so cute it’s pretty.  England’s playing may be sloppy at times, for international level play.  These commentators crossed my offense-line when they called the English team’s playing ‘not pretty’ = UGLY.  I suspect US sensitivities make it more polite to say ‘not pretty’ than ‘ugly’. 

Dead legs. “There are a lot of dead-legs in that box“  ‘The box’ refers to a marked area on the pitch immediately surrounding the goal.  The ‘penalty box’ is generally considered the space from where goals can most easily be scored.  A foul commited by the defending team in the box gives the attacking side a penalty kick,  hence the name penalty box.  The commentators used the verbal shorthand “P K” to refer to penalty kicks.  I thought ‘Dead leg’ was a euphamism for someone useless.  I like to believe the commentator was suggesting these people were tired rather than useless.

stepped. “Wayne Rooney just steps on him,  the referee did a good thing he saw the step then he took him off“  actually Wayne Rooney kicked him in the bollocks.  “when Rooney stepped on him that was a big no-no”.   These Amercan’s and their ‘polite’ euphamisms.  ‘Stepped‘  “big no-no“,  Hahaha.  

motivating. The commentators suggested that England’s (ugly?) performance was attributable to Sven Goran Eriksson and the coaches style. ”I think the coach didn’t motivate the players” They suggested neither had adequate motivational discourses with the team.  I’m assuming they mean US style ‘motivational’ perhaps they think that Sven’s not sufficiently ’super excited’.   

distraught. “Beckham is in tears on the sideline” Taken off in the 53rd minute due to injury.  I cried at that point.  People do cry at football matches.  Audience and players,  after misfortune and GOALS. I find it hard to think of the England team as lacking motivation when there are such clear physical displays of emotion and determination.   Sadness is quickly and effectively conveyed by subtle positioning of facial musccles.  Camera shots of England player’s faces after they lost the kick-off were strikingly different from earlier in the game.

UK based England fans.  ”79% of people in the UK watched England Ecuador match that’s amazing that’s the difference between English and American Football“  I like it when commentators throw in some statistics.  I wonder how they could possibly know that - how was the information gathered?   79% is especially impressive because the UK includes Scotland,  Wales and Northern Ireland.  The commentator didn’t mention this.  British people appear to support which ever regional team is left playing. Scotland, Wales and Ireland teams have already been knocked out of the 2006 World Cup.  An even higher proportion of English people outside of the UK probably watched the match.  All my English friends in the US did.  The dedication of the fan base is only ONE difference between American and English football.  Not THE difference.   

England fans in Germany. The commentators rarely commented on the fans in the ground.  Exceptions included comments at the end of extra time like “Nobody in the stadium has sat down for an hour“.  The English fan’s vocal and musical presence was a very strong part of the whole experience right from the beginning of the match.  The commentators often had to ’shout’ to be heard over the background noise of the England fans.   The fans sang

• “God save our gracious Queen….”  (Chorus of the British National Anthem)  
• Eng-GER-land Eng-GER-land…
• “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO“ 
• “O-lay, Olay-Olay-Olay”
• clapping (and horns) :    clap-clap     clap-clap-clap     clap-clap-clap-CLAP    CLAP-CLAP

After England lost the game the relative quiet was striking.  The Portugeuse winning cheers were quieter than the England supporters’ encouraging chanting.

history. “History is against England” the commentators’ discourse implies that because England has never won a penalty kick-off in the World cup they are hampered in some way.  Huh?  Whether someone-else did or didn’t score a goal in a different competition will impact whether this player does or doesn’t score a goal?  That’s just silly, silly silly.  Scoring is completely attributable to the ability of the players (shooter and goalie) at the time they take the shot. 

“previously an umotivated not pretty deadleg would streak into the box and step on an airborne bench, that’s a no-no, giving the opposition a P.K.  History is against the bench“ 

translates, in Wendy-English, to

“previously, tired players have raced into the penalty box and kicked jumping substitutes in the bollocks, that’s a foul, giving the opposition a penalty kick and prompting disapproving ‘booo’s from the fans. It could happen again. 

Caskets on display

Originally uploaded by :: Wendy ::.

Prepared for Memorial Day