Sixth post prompted by the utterly outrageous ‘England and the English: from an American point of view” book by Price Collier. This chapter required 2 tea-pots full for me to maintain composure (that’s a lot).
Price asks are the English dull? He concludes that the English are dull because they are stable, steady in their resolve, quoting the contemporary (circa 1900) British soundbite “England expects every man to do his duty” p178. He follows this by briefly mentioning that the English have a highly developed sense of humour quickly counters by unfavourably comparing their use of the English language to that of Americans. He find’s the English use of their language lacking because of overuse of profanities (the bugger!), poor sentence structure and lack of mass education. Am I taking this all too personally? Of course I am! Yet he doesn’t mention spelling atrocities because most English people can’t even write. He cites this convincing statistic as evidence of lack of ability to write:
“Ten years after the beginning of the reign of queen Victoria, not only the children of England, but practically one half of the adults, could neither read nor write… ..only sixty-seven men in one hundred, and fifty-one women in an hundred, could even sign their names.” p183
This statistic is based on people that could sign thier names on a marriage register, it is likely that some could sign their names and nothing else, hence it is an over-estimation of actual literacy. On profanity Price writes:
“A charming English lady returning from the golf links on a wet day remarks that she is ‘in a nasty mess!’. The English man of a certain class uses ‘bloody’, ‘beastly’, ‘rotten’, ‘bloomin’, and ‘go, on you brute’. p186
SHOCKING! They didn’t say “bollocks’ or “bugger’ as frequently as I do ;-) I find it extremely hard to believe that these profanities are worse than those used by his American contemporaries. Can you feel the tension rising, I’m on tea-pot number 2 already!
Price suggests that this lack of formal education is counterbalanced by the English having a focus on commerce:
“‘Lud’ was the God of commerce, who was worshipped in England in Pagan times. Ludgate Hill is a remainder, or reminder, or Lud. The Welsh still call London ‘Caer Ludd’, or Lud’s town. Thus it is seen how deep are the roots of their commercial supremecy.” p195
In summary, the English are illiterate, swear a lot, but in their favour they stay focussed on achieving a goal if they think it will make them money. It is difficult to believe that Price likes the English, his affection does not shine through. He does say in his defence that he “numbers many Englishmen among his friends” p14 Pah! Do they count him amongst their friends? Probably only if he gives them a cut of the royalties from his book…..
Can you guess what the next chapter is about? Sport! Will he rail on fox hunting, what does he think of Football and Rugby? He’s already made copious references to golf. I use the golf references as time to make my next pot of tea…. ….I’m not sure if I will be able to finish this book because it’s a tad insulting and its not going to make me any money…..
Other posts prompted by Price’s analysis of the English:
- heavy
- fashion-failed females
- provincially bumptious
- the finest of all German tribes
- mens club