scribbles tagged ‘breaking up’

risking happiness

Tuesday, January 20th, 2009 | tags: , , ,  |

lots of pink rosesI love you

I love you too

Are you happy?

No

What do you need to make you happy?

Not much, just to talk to you most days to hear the stories of your life, the laughter the pain, the stuff you normally share with friends. An occasional bunch of flowers, notes that tell me you love me, they can be insulting, I’ll know from the note and thought that you love me, I just need to know it through a thought or story

I can’t live my days remembering to find time to call you, to leave you a note, to be worrying about what I should do rather than living my life now, I can’t be worrying if I’ve checked-in with you enough to keep you happy, I’ll worry about whether you’re happy. It will make me unhappy

Oh, we’ll both be unhappy

I love you

I love you too

We can’t be happy together

It seems we can’t be happy

If we break-up we’ll be unhappy, but we’ll have the opportunity to be happy with someone else.

Yes, but I love you and want to be happy with you

It wont happen

No

lets part and risk happiness

[the silence of tears]

risking happiness
rate wendys scribble

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My super-hero votes go to…

Tuesday, October 18th, 2005 | tags: , , ,  |

during  immediate post-relationship insomina-trauma my ‘your absolutely fabulous’ votes go to:

  • Rob –  because he’s a boy with the gutsiness to  double-cheek kiss british rugby players.   Hooray for pluckiness!
  • Raymond – for providing wacky overnight reading material to make me giggle,   how does he find the time to be a ‘guru’,   speak and code in multiple obscure languages, and dig up obscure, yet spookily sensible, sociological  phenomena.
  • M – for an outstanding,   promptly delivered,  2 hour phone conversation that included gems like ‘insomnia makes things happen’ and wonderfully surreal details of M’s own passage through life followed by some subtly subversive plans for upcoming weekends.   Hooray.   I’m so lucky to know people who can understand what I’m saying through the sound of blubby-blubby-really-blubby-tears in a foreign accent over a cellular service.   M’s the best.
  • Drew – because he recommended the book on plastics in culture which impending post-realtionship insomnia will now give me time to read.   He’s also aware of Spokane.   Spokane is a mystery to me,   maybe I should drive there one night and tell you all about it.   What do you think,   Spokane,   land of mystery ‘exposed’?
  • Tiger – for suggesting a painting project and tackling the hug-over-7,000-miles-apart-over-the-internet challenge.
  • 4 individuals who invited me out to dinner almost every evening  this week.   Maybe some of them want a complimentary painting to their own brief?
  • The Gal  who blames the full moon.
  • The Posse who spontaneously arranged to chauffer me to a bar that sells good British beer for a mini party.

The goodness is I know that I can still ‘feel’ with the passion of a teenager.    Years haven’t ‘numbed’ me with sensible,   detached, reasonableness to being suddenly single.   It would seem I’m not sensible by nature.

The badness is the extreme pain.   I have no idea how long it will take to leave, let me sleep, be peaceful in myself again.    I’m not Ms-bugger-up-your-life. Unfortunately I’m also not a bonus for a person that I became very attached to.   Darn.   C’est la vie.   Maybe there’s a plucky person out there just waiting to have me bounce into their life and show them the joy of messiness.   I’m off to try and sleep now,   wish me well,   I need your good   thoughts…..
Wendy just-passed-the-life-is-more-bizarre-than-fiction-midnight-benchmark

My super-hero votes go to…
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