wendy house

Pippa: I’ve pdf’d my desktop

IT Wiz: Yep,   I’ve never seen anyting like it, I’ll have to take your computer away,   after I”ve looked-at Wendy’s computer

wendy:   LOOK! my computer is a large shiny black thinkpad thingy see

IT Wiz: that’s not the type of look-at I meant

wendy: what does pdf’d your desktop mean?

IT Wiz: clicking on any executible opens as a pdf

wendy: Pippa, you genious! how’d you do that?

Pippa:   I think I put my elbow on the keyboard when I was making a phone call

wendy: I’d quite like to pdf a few people’s desktops, can I borrow your elbow?

IT Wiz:   WENDY. Calm down

Holiday warning!   Cornwall here we come!

With my

Rod Stewart haircut,

Oakley sunglasses,

figure hugging fab frocks,

I’ll be wandering over the rocks on the coast.

Rock chic!

There will also be the standard Wendy, none-rock chic, outbreaks of:

• A bit of paddling
• collecting pretty coloured, pocket-sized, pebbles
• eating  fish and chips wrapped in newspaper for supper
• wearing Sunhats galore (consecutively)
• reading a book about the Medici
• blowing rasberries at the seaguls
• riding the local BUSES on windy cliffside roads

Excitedness levels are already Amber.   OH!

What is the best 45th birthday present for a Wendy?   A four day weekend in  Siena with spottydog as

• tour organiser.
• tour guide.  
• conversational sparring partner.  
• first-aid specialist,   she’ll have the plasters for when I fall-over, which she reliably informs me that I will, because I’ll be looking up at the architecture rather than at street-level obstacles.
• personal shopper,   because she has this uncanny  skill for inducing me to part with cash like no other person I have ever met.
• extended memory.

Excitedness levels have already reached amber.   Spotty dog has cunningly avoided booking through the recently defunct XL, travelling at ridiculous hours of the day,     waiting at transport interchanges for silly, silly, times and other such icky nonsense.

The exciteness levels have been raised from the bog-standard, yet rare,  red to the yet-more-rare blood-red level.  

Defining characteristics of blood-red excitement level  are

• Foul mood [insert a liberal dose of varied expletives here].
• unanticipated menstrual timing adjustment.
• optional clothing stains due to unanticipated timing adjustment.
• the level automatically reverts to the red level after a period of approximately 60hrs.

Red excitedness characteristics:

• falling over.   Think or how the USS enterprise wobbles and throws the crew from side to side when attacked by the klingons or travelling through an asteroid belt.
• dribbling.   Pouring tea becomes particularly tricky leaving drips all over the place.
• Perpetual waffling. A striking lack of precision in speach and writing rather like rambing only not in the countryside but in words and really not worthy of reading. Editor skills are desperately needed during a red alert to head-off the waffle effect.
• tears before bedtime.  Over spilt tea,   bruised knees, being misunderstood  etc

Why now?

Only 4 weeks before my Greek sailing holiday!   I’ve made the lists  & purchased the essentials.   From here-on in its all about getting over-excited.

Amber excitedness characteristics:

• unpredictable outbreaks of persistent smiling.
• mugs of undrunk tea appearing around the house because I’ve forgotten that I have already made myself a cup of tea.
• frequent brief outbursts of hyper-inactivity.   Sitting-still to enjoy thinking about whatever I’m getting excited about.
• increased incidences of burbling.

Why now?

This year I’ll be  sailing to half a dozen or so Islands in Greece with 7 strangers and a friend for 10 days on a 50ft yaught.   The trip bochure tells me that   Hemingway ‘Would have’ turned up at the Island of Sifnos,   that we can visit the Kitron Brewery on Naxos.   All over the Islands we can admire ancient architecture,   visit Churches, Temples and many many Tavernas.   Snorkling, dolphins  and beaches are also mentioned.      

OooOoOOooOoOoOOoOoHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhh

the Ray Bans are out!