:: The Wendy House ::

This weekend I’m moving into the new Wendy House.  A stable.  This may lead to blogging service interruption as it takes a while to get the Wendyhome up and running with unpacked furniture, services connected and hay out of the corners etc 

Hopefully my passport will not get mislaid in the move,  there will be no explosions,  falls, and the neighbours will not die suddenly and suspiciously.  It’s happened before…

New Zealander: are you homesick?

Wendy:  Homesick?

New Zealander: 8 years is a long time to live in the US, do you miss it?

In the quest for a new Wendy House of my own I have been visiting a variety of Estate agents,  one at a time.  They all ask: 

What’s your current address?

 The Wendy Pent-House

Can you see the theme in the replies?

#1 Romans Estate Agent:  the big white house?

#2 Carsons Estate Agent:  the big white house?  I just sold a flat there for 240,000, very nice.

#3: Prospect Estate Agent:  the big white house?  We have a flat for sale there by Mr. [name], would you like to view it?

Wendy to prospect agent: [family name]?

Agent:  Yes,  he’s…

Wendy: …a professional football player,  the other people living in the building told me about him* he’s currently on loan to [football team,  not based in Reading].

Agent:  You’ve just missed him by minutes.  He came in here,  just now,  that’s quite a coincidence…

Wendy (oozing insincerity out of every orifice and some pores too): Oh dear,  what a shame.

*an unpublishable variety of unflattering names were used by to describe the fellow and descriptions of how he engaged with them.

senior colleague:

“Wendy is one of our best.  She’s the sort of girl that, when she says she’s leaving you think,  Wow that’s a great new job but boy are we f**ked“

junior colleague:

“blub-blub-blub,  blub-blub,  blub-blub-blub” (or noises to that effect)

someone in the corridor:

“f-off back to blighty then you old trout” (no-one was plucky-enough to actually say this,  I made it up)

senior colleague

“once you’ve learned how to spell,  stop wearing velvet, and start talking properly rather than your geeky research stuff then the world will be your oyester” (Mushroom implied,  this wasn’t Raymond)

friend

“would you like a lift to the airport?”

colleague:

“how many days vacation will you get?”

friend

“they have Anne Klien in the UK” (me - who’s Ann Klien?)

anonymous

“do they have mountains in England?”

sadly deluded commenter on theoldnewthing blog ’shipper’

“disappointed that Raymond and Wendy didn’t end up together”

The New York Times

“    “

Disclaimers:

• this blog is fictional.

• any offense caused to any friend or colleague is purely intentional.

• all spelling mistakes are deliberate.

• I reserve the right to relocate again if someone makes me the right offer.

• are you still reading? You get brownie points for perseverence, ability to scroll or possession of a huge monitor or dense screen resolution (take your pick).

• I like lists

According to the world clock on November 9th sunset started in Reading UK (16.24hrs) only 16 mins before Seattle WA (16.40hrs).  This small difference was noticable.  Winter feels more announced by the Reading daylight in the UK.  Summer days are longer too,  Hoorah!

Snow is not part of the regular winter menu in Reading.  It’s only lightly part of the Seattle diet but they do like to make a fuss about it.  I gather there was some snow recently as this photograph by Jenn suggests.

Now please excuse me while I do some laundry in an Electrolux front-loading washing machine with 700 different settings and the capacity of a large hankerchief….

After one week in Abadair house The Wendy House is temporarily relocating to one of the 4 top floor flats (US = apartment) in this classy Reading townhouse.  It’s an extremely cute minature penthouse that has furniture to match.   The landlady reliably informs me that all walls and floors are decidedly uneven so I have to take precautions against sea-sickness.  Not to worry about the pigeons living in the wall cavity,  their coo-ing can be quite cute in the morning.  The chap who lives below is called ‘cannabis man’ so I don’t have to worry about disturbing him because he is extremely well chilled.  The people in the flat next door are called the little people,  and indeed they are,  but not pre-adolescent little.  Evidently I can see directly into the flats opposite and below,  more of that fun nightime activity in a later post…

A multifamily garage sale on the Wendy House street.  I sold stuff that would be unnecessary for living in a smaller UK style Wendy House.  We wisely picked a cold, rainy, November day for the sale, advertised on craigslist, expo live, and with street-signs.  People arrived an hour before the start.  We made good value sales in the first 2hrs then dropped prices radically to end with effectively shifting quantity, nearly everything. 

Several friends helped make the sale a fun, pleasant, and effective experience by displaying stuff attractively,  being nice to the customers and making sure everyone had tea, Thai hot soup, and donuts as needed.