a not-Wendy person once said to me:
“it should be ok to cry at work“
After I’d picked myself up off the floor and tended to my pending bruises (I’m prone to falling over). I considered that I’m also prone to blubbing.
I cried when they shot JR even though Dallas wasn’t a believable TV series, the acting was atrocious, and I didn’t even like JR. I can often be heard sniffling my way through a film (The Hours, Capote).
But crying at work, because of work related thingies? With some notable exceptions, for example Hospice work,
I’d really rather it didn’t happen
Examples of why crying at work does not get the (wet) blanket, or wet hankerchief, Wendy seal of approval:
- the wetness can ruin the key-connections on your keyboard and make typing coherent sentences virtually impossible.
- crying and talking is a bit of a challenge. This means other people can’t understand a word you say while you are crying.
- the vast majority of work situations should not prompt tears. No-one, or situation, should have the right or the power to prompt crying at work.
Behind closed doors, in car parks, and sometimes in bars after work I’ve listened to people cry about work situations. Normally the crier is female and describes what I consider to be bullying or in my more cynical moments, out-and-out sexism.
Naturally, an opinionated Wendy believes that the answer isn’t to legitimise the symptoms of bullying (victim crying), it is to remove the cause (behaviour experienced as bullying). The person who feels like crying has the responsibility of identifying the cause and confronting the cause directly or using appropriate ‘personnel’ services to seek advice.
Asking an opinionated Wendy really isn’t a good idea because the crying might just get all contageious, twice the short-circuited keyboards and twice the unintelligable conversations, twice the tea consumption level. Really, that just wont do, now, will it?
Lets cut the reasons for crying at work