Two ladies with well-coiffed silver hair at the table next to me would leave their table, wine, handbags (under table) in-between each course. They walked out of the restaurant, across the pavement and stood in the gutter smoking cigarettes together.
A gale-force wind hampered their conversation and smoking while they huddled in the gutter. Their camaraderie seemed to make these obstacles melt into the background.
Go girls!
As the snow recedes it reveals the debris of an unseen drama.
A perfectly formed wing, depaired from it’s partner.
Did the wearer ‘fall’ or were they pushed?
The driver of the car behind me in this traffic jam hadn’t bothered to remove the 4 inches of snow from the roof, bonnet, lights and even most of the windscreen of their car – before driving it.
I had to fight the urge to get out of my car and clean their windscreen for them. I pity the car behind them – when chunks of snow come flying off the roof, heading like iced snowballs at their windscreen.
It’s all fun and games on the British roads after a freak snow fall.
Iced tea and Tennessee Bourbon on the menu today at the wendy house. We don’t often get snow so this is a bit of treat.
There was an impromptu party in my local convenience store. Groups of young folk were discussing what essential supplies they wanted in case food deliveries are blocked by snow. I wandered around slowly, enjoying the cheerful young folk and sensibly dressed adult impersonators. Alcohol, tea, bread and milk were selling fast.
Snow on the roof of the wendy house orangerie is keeping the heat in without blocking the light. It’s my own little igloo-style roof. Meanwhile Sampo snores with unabashed contentment in prime position by the woodburning stove
A month’s worth of rain falls overnight, 96 flood warnings in the UK. Sampo’s gone bellly-up. We’re expecting Trouble, and that starts with T which rhymes with P and that stands for Pool, which is bigger than a Puddle which rhymes with Trouble.
I suspect Sampo will float if the Thames decides to rise up to the Wendy House garden.
No clouds were harmed in the production of this post
Somewhere in the UK is almost always partly cloudy
When my phone announced that the UK was partly cloudy I was baffled by it’s desire to share the obvious
Luckily the weather announcers here in the UK have developed creative ways of describing these clouds, to keep us entertained on many an overcast day. How can anyone fail to find many ways of describing and falling in love with skies like these:
“another scorcher” (high of 29 celcius, USA = 84 F)
“hot and humid”
“thundery downpours”
This morning’s weather forcast is using language normally reserved for a tempestuous relationship. A refreshing change.
The UK met office doesn’t publish humidity levels. Weatherforce UK provide a humity map for the whole of the UK that is impossible to read, tiny white text on a yellow background.
In the NW USA 28% meant humid
Floppy cat on the cool-kitchen tiles meant humid
What does humid mean in the UK? It’s still a mystery to me…
BBC radio 4 reported that many houses were inundated with water in the Queensland floods. The reporter went on to explain that the water contained snakes and crocodiles, but that the local residents were taking this in their stride. The image of Australians pragmatically striding through crocodile infested water was an entertaining image of a devastating event.
Halfway up the Thames Valley’s infamous Streatly Bobsliegh run the Reading team stop to discuss
how best to use their cardboard sled
advanced tree-stump avoidance tactics
healthcare provision
Recently the BBC reported that Reading town would be the victim of a
biting northeasterly wind
BITING
Unlike the Newcastle locals, the Reading town locals can be seen shivering at the Bus stops wearing tooth-proof clothing.
my colleage looks outside the window at the blue sky, looks back at me, raises a single eyebrow slowly then the edges of her mouth swing out while her lips furl from her teeth revealing the cheekiest of grins.
wendy: I know, it sounds a bit bonkers, but this room just does smell like rain to me, can you smell it?
colleague: no (laughs, then, about a minute later) OH MY GOD. WENDY! Look out the window, its raining!
A cloud above the building that we couldn’t see was dumnping its load with avengance, rain against blue skys. To me the smell was overwhelming and kinda sexy. Apparantly the other people in the room couldn’t smell the rain through the building walls.
On planet wendy we not only smell the future coming we often hear then trip-over it too.
the snow is cold and fresh, lets go out on the downs and make love, I really want to make love outdoors, please…
I knew the pull of making love in freshly fallen snow.
But not with him. We weren’t even friends, let alone lovers. Once I would have considered that all part of the fun. I’d learned the hard way that strangers with a sense of vitality, of living life to the full, seemed to come in a package that perversely included a need to possess, control. To own you in a way that breaks legal and moral boundaries, that breaks skin, bone, hearts and noses. I’m more cautious now.
Masturbate or find another partner, I’m not interested
During the recent snow, cars moved very, very slowly and often moved into unintended places with slow, steady momentum.
It’s difficult to forget the world while shivering. Its worth a try. Getting a good wood burning stove is also worth a try
snow patrol sang chasing cars
Last night I decided to go into work today.
A week after Thomas got snowed into the drive, finally I planned on taking him out for a spin and some slip sliding…
This morning 3 inches of new snow fall, still coming, quickly scuppered that rash little plan.
affecting all of the UK
Normally the weather only affects a bit of the UK while the rest of the UK remains weatherless.
Weatherlessness? No wind, no fog, no rain, no thunderstorms, no snow, no blue skies… …a silent, still, greyness lingering oppressively
There is a national shortage of kitty litter.
The National press are conspiring to supress this story. Some regional press are sneaking out reports. The Burton press managed this excerpt:
Tesco, on St Peter’s Bridge, sold out of cat litter on Thursday as customers grabbed supplies to use as a handy and effective substitute for gritting salt. Sales have rocketed by 70 per cent in a week.
The East anglia times noted panic purchase of pussy essentials
Customers at Tesco stores in Kesgrave and Martlesham are reporting a shortage of eggs, bread and milk, while there was also word of rapidly emptying shelves at Sainsbury’s in Warren Heath. Anti-freeze products, boots and thermal underwear have also proved popular, alongside a surprise best-seller – cat litter.
Local councils are running out of grit for the roads so private citizens are stepping-up to fill the void left by the hording and abusing of the litter of the cat. This reduces supplies for normal cat toilet abilities. There could be unanticipated consequences.
Your eyewitness, on the spot, roving reporter [ME!] is out and about interviewing the kitties that matter, those suffering from this very shortage.
In this revealing interview footage we listen to
Matrix has difficulty walking on the snow and fails to find an acceptable toilet. Her experience is similar to that of many of the UKs mainly outdoor kitties.
What will happen next?
How can I improvise when my stocks run out and my indoor kitties refuse to conduct their ablutions in the snow. OH!
For your own safety, please avoid walking under the permanently affixed luminance apparatus on the Wendy House frontage
Sorry for the inconvenience
This message is bought to you courtesy of wendy, the fluffballs, January snow…
…the cup of T
and the number 3
A trickle of water from the cold water tap.
Less that a trickle from the hot water tap,
Not enough flow to ignite the combi-bolier heating. Brrrr…
I made a cup of tea, inspecting all visible pipes in the house and the stop-cock that supplies water to the house.
All were well.
Thames Water website show a daily list of major water mains leaks and areas they affect. There is a leak nearby, but it shouldn’t be affecting my home. There is a note that they are having difficulty getting to burst water mains and that the phones are very busy. I should be patient.
I coat, boot and glove-up. Then carry my spade through the ice and snow covered garden.
The garden water tap is frozen. I can’t turn it. No sign of a leak. I get to the roadside and dig out my water valve and check the meter. It’s not ticking over. No water coming onto my property. Phew, no leak on my property means I dont have to call out a plumber on my expense. Inconvenience rather than inconvenience and financial burden. Phew.
The neighbors have no water at all. I offer them use of my trickle to fill their kettle for tea. We watch as a child hikes by with 4 large bottles of water. A man walks by and asks if we have water, we tell him no and he is pleased. He’s just visited his lonely frightened mother, he goes back to reasure her that its the water mains.
Plenty of white snow around for creating untreated water. I’m not going to die of thirst in the near future or run out of Tea
I wonder if snow is full of chemicals or fresh enough to drink as it once was. Luckily I haven’t had to find out – yet.
The trickle from my tap filled some bottles for tea and the bath to flush the toilet.
Here in the UK we have roads who’s whole purpose is to provide relief, relief Roads.
The pleasingly named Rose Kiln Lane is a Berkshire relief road. Roads that provide relief. A ver pleasing idea.
Having a stressful day at work? Then visit Rose Kiln Lane to find relief.
Judging by this web camera picture very few people have been using Rose Kiln Lane for relief during this cold snap. No yellow snow, cars, or people to be seen.
My fluffballs are indoor kitties with their own kitty-litter box.
Many british cats are outdoor-indoor cats with their own ‘cat-flap’ in the household door, window or wall.
How does such deep and freezing snow affect outdoor cats? How do they get through a cat-flap that is below snow level? Even if their human digs out the snow by the flap where do they make the cat pathway go? Cats like to bury their doings, how do they do this when the earth and snow is frozen?
I’m concerned for the many cats that do their doings outside. It’s not made national news yet but given cat ownership in this country it is a pending disaster. Worse, on a personal level I’m running low on my supply of kitty-litter.
What to do with indoor kitties that need doings doing and no litter for doing it in?
Perhaps I was a bit premature with the melting snow post.
Thomas has been buried alive.
I’ve cunningly avoided yet another Gym subscription nightmare by resorting to digging out the Wendy House garden path.
After 24 hours of snow, 30cm in my back garden, the local shops are suffering from depleted stocks. People who when stranded at home must have a steady supply of toast, ideally spread with marmite, are buying thier bread. No new deliveries. You do the maths…
Toastie!
Will I have to compromise the purity of my toast by taking my marmite on toasted teacakes? Tonight I’m planning to pop around my perky, yet elderly, neighbour’s house to…
…share some seasonal bubbly – more toastie!
…and snow stories in front of a glowing fireplace – even more toastie!
then I’ll take their food order round to the corner shop where I’ll
battle for some buns.
At the Elephant Hotel, Pangbourne, the guests stranded by the suddent, unexpected, snowfall share stories of how they came to be at this hotel
Formerly Handsome Other Guest (FHOG): (slurred) I wanted to bring the truck out tonight, but my wife wanted to come in the Merc
wendy: (snigger)
FHOG: So we came in the Merc because I always have to do what she says (slurred with a venemous undertone)
FHOG: but she’s admitted she was wrong this time, for the first time in 10 years marriage she’s admitted she was wrong (triumphant venemous overtones with a hint of over-exaggeration. Yuck)
wendy: I drove my little Honda civic automatic up the Cascade moutains in Western Washington to a ski resort during a snow storm. But then, my alternative was a bicycle not a truck
FHOG: this is my mother….
Reminder to self – a black polo-neck jumper, stylish set of spectacles and slim build do not predict good-heartedness. Sometimes I’m such a slow learner.
3pm. Somewhere near Didcot. 21st December
How sensible am I, starting my journey back to Reading?
Unbeknownst to me, Reading had already come to a standstill
The Reading Chronical had already published the standstill*
6pm. Pangbourne. 21st December
This is where I encountered the full car neige, the tail end of the traffic trying to get into Reading. The traffic standing still, sliding sideways, not yet abandoned. Local radio traffic news talked 50 yards taking 2 hours to cover. Urrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhh……
Across the next hour I called and consulted with multiple friends. The phone network was often too busy to connect my calls. Despite the presense of many car drivers I felt very alone. My calm sensible friends and I agreed that I needed to get off the road quickly and get shelter for the night.
wendy: do you have any spare rooms for the night?
receptionist: stranded?
wendy: yes, well, um, yes
receptionist: we have one room left, would you like a toothbrush with that?
wendy: OH! (signifying relief at getting a room and supportive receptionist) Yes please, thank you, I was turned away from the hotel down the road, a toothbrush! how thoughtful
Handsome Other Guest (HOG): we’re stranded too, I’ve only got a hammer and some ski poles in the boot of my car, maybe we can do a deal over the toothbrush?
wendy: I’ve got a blanket in my car, we could build something like a tent with the poles and hammer. Not sure where the toothbrush comes in
HOG: (Huge smile then turns to receptionist) table for 6 please
receptionist: we’re waiting for the chef to get in before we finalise the menu, we’ll try and feed everyone
HOG: Table for 6? Can you put me on the waiting list
Clearly the snow car chaos called for some serious parking-up and a pint of Butcombe. My party for one joined a few other party’s for one and we all shared stories of family, cars, hills, walking, the IT industry and other topical faerie tales.
* the exceptional Number 17 bus was still on the move, albeit erratically.
3pm. Somewhere near Didcot. 21st December
work colleague: leaving already?
wendy: it’s started snowing
work colleague: I didn’t think you were the nervous type, to leave so early.
Wendy: I’m not nervous, I’m sensible. Call me sensible wendy. I’ll call you when I get home safely.
Ha hahahahahaaaaaaa how sensible am I?
why I love England #12:generous heavens
When the heavens open we are blessed with the peaceful hypnotic sound of rain
on the Wendy House roof
on a summer evening
How hot was it today?
The thermometer says DANG HOT, no number necessary.
The kitties look cool as pie, stetched out in the conservatory hot house rather than in the cool dark back room where I’m making my way through a chocolate eclair accompanied by a sleeve of Old Speckled Hen.
In December 1981 most of the 1000 or so pupils turned up at my school during the snowy week, only a few teachers managed to get to school.
SLACKERS!
The story was very similar to the current snow-stopped-school. Except that the current snow brings the country to a standstill crisis because parents are having to stay at home to look after their kids, in 1981 the kids stayed at the closed school and thrashed the proverbial ski-pants of each other.
In 1981 the few, local, teachers who turned-up organised mass snowball fights between academic years. In this photo the 3rd year students on the right hand side are advancing on the 2nd year students who are bravely running away to the left.
RUNAWAY!
The third year won thier foray. I was in the 6th form. The 5th year thoroughly squished snow down our necks, up our not insubstantial noses and in our pants, jolly good fun it was too. Hot scrumpy all round, Hoorah!
BBC reports
Listen to a BBC reporter and local Brit’s talk about the experience, see huge waves, see planes fighting to take off, trees blocking roads and workers in orange tops trying to sort-out the mess: Embedded windows Media player on BBC site.
The CIA estimates the population of Britain to be 60,609,153 (minus 9), that’s about 12 times the estimated population of Washington state. More pople to be impacted by a Storm on an island. Woodland’s junior school puts density of people point succinctly:
Britain is a relatively densely populated country: it is more than twice as densely populated as France (106 people per sq.km), nine times as densely populated as the USA (27 people per sq.km) and 100 times as densely populated as Australia (2 people per sq.km).
I’ll be checking in with my family this weekend, no-one’s called which is always a good sign with my family 
My voicemail recieved a pre-recorded message from the people that empty my bins: (US = ‘waste disposal service’).
thier tape recorder phones my tape recorder
The impending ‘weather event’ might interrupt my service. Not to worry! They’ll come next week and take twice the rubbish away. Hooray! Wonderfully polite and thoughtful.
‘weather event’?! Seattle services’ way of saying “snow“, “high winds“, ‘something not nice’, ‘some nastiness’ without causing customers to panic. Or, maybe they’re expecting a heat-wave and the bin service people to call in ‘sick’ as they dash to ‘reccuperate’ on the local beaches with their surf boards. ‘Weather event‘ certainly covers a broad range of possibilities.
Near me the weather event turned out to be a couple of hours of snow, producing ‘slush’ on the roads, local Seattle drivers aqua-planning or deserting their cars on the roadside. Some parts of the Seattle region collected over half a foot of snow. Meanwhile, LooSea didn’t even skid in our local 3 inches. Here are LooSea’s tracks mixed with evidence of people, cars and bicyles outside the Wendy House… …in the evening slush..
